Below are some tips that I wish I had known or items I would have liked to already have had during labour and immediately after. This is just what helped me, it’s not a definitive list but it’s helpful.
Labour
- Contraction timer app
- I didn’t have an app downloaded for this already and there’s loads out there. I used the Gentle Birth contraction timer as I’d been using their hypnobirthing app.
- The contraction timer app was super easy to use and convinced my boyfriend I really was having contractions. Also useful when you first get to hospital to be able to tell them how many contractions you’ve had, how long, close together etc as this is information you won’t retain!
- Pain relief
- Pre labour do proper research into each type of pain relief available to you and their side effects so you can make an informed decision going into labour of what you want. In my birth plan I wrote I didn’t want an epidural, after getting to fully dilated with no pain relief I was SCREAMING for an epidural! For me it was the best thing I did – especially when I found out as I was about to start pushing she was back to back so that would have been a WILD ride with no pain relief
During labour
All the hypnobirthing, meditations, birth prep goes out the window. I’ve never experienced a pain like it and it’s incomparable to anything other than labour. The contractions really are like waves – you feel them gradually rising, they peak and then dissipate. My TENS machine and handheld fan saw me through to fully dilated without any pain relief. Would I recommend that – no not really. But I did it. Buckle in it’s one hell of a ride!
Immediately after birth
In all honesty I did not feel an outpouring of love straight away for my daughter. I was relieved she was ok and everything was fine. I was ecstatic I was no longer pregnant but I wasn’t madly in love with her. Birth is traumatic and is a massive physical undertaking. It took a while for me to ground and process that I now had a daughter. It took me a good few days and the outpouring of Oxytocin that comes with breastfeeding to properly fall in love with her. But for those first 48-72 hours I felt a connection but I would have saved myself from a burning building first. Now I would take her out with me! But in all seriousness it’s completely normal to feel quite indifferent to your baby as soon as they’re born. Focus on yourself and patching yourself back up – the love for your baby will come.
Breastfeeding
Try it – if it doesn’t work persevere for as long as you can. It may not work but you can always say you tried and then you won’t be disappointed. That said if you’re adamant you don’t want to, don’t. There’s too much bloody pressure on women that breastfeeding is the be all and end all. Breast is best is bollocks. Fed is best. Your one aim is just to keep your child alive every 24 hours. How you get through the 24 hours and how their survival happens is secondary – just get through.
Water
You will be unbelievably thirsty. I was told to get a bottle with a straw after I’d given birth I mean yes, this probably would be useful and I will get one as less likely to be spilled.
Food
I vomited so much in labour. Got to the bile level of sick which is not enjoyable when paired with contractions, so I was starving after I’d given birth and the epidural had worn off. I didn’t bring any snacks into hospital but the grapes and crisps and sandwich my boyfriend came back with was most welcome.
Hospital Essentials
- a handheld fan
- Water bottle with a straw.
- I didn’t have one with a straw but I wish I had!! Mango Water Bottle With Straw – 900ml Motivational Time Markings – BPA Free Sports Bottles With Flip Nozzle And Leakproof Cap
- Baggy dress you can breastfeed in
- Period pants
- You need LOADS of these. I find them much more comfortable than wearing a pad and cooler too. With the lochia I found I was going through a pair every 2 hours. I took 8 pairs into the hospital and that just about saw me through but I used pads in them to make them last longer while in there
- INNERSY Women Period Pants High Waist Postpartum Underwear Leakproof Menstrual Knickers Pack of 3
- Witchhazel and Aloe Gel
- I squirt this in my period pants and find it really soothing. The Witch Hazel Experts | Alcohol Free Witch Hazel & Aloe Vera Gel 100ml | Hydrating Relief Gel for Irritated Skin (Witch Hazel & Aloe Vera)
- Nappies
- The hospital don’t provide them. I took these biodegradable ones but tried my first resuable one in hospital and LOVED them. Ecoby Naty Baby Nappies, Newborn, 100 Ct, Plant-based with 0% Oil Plastic on Skin, One Month Supply
- Resuable Nappies.
- These Pop-in newborn ones are INCREDIBLE. You can find second hand ones from FB marketplace and eBay. I cannot recommend the Pop-in newborn ones enough
- Wetbag
- Essential if you’re using reusable nappies. Fiyaah is a wonderful female run small business and Amina the owner is super helpful. I have an extra large one for one and three medium / small ones for out and about
- Resuable wipes
- SO much easier than you can imagine. Honestly you’re going to be doing so much washing anyway why not try the wipes? I use cheeky wipes Cheeky Wipes – 25 Washable Cotton Terry Cloth Wipes, 15x15cm White Reusable Towelling Wipes, Extra Soft & Perfect for Cleansing Baby’s Hands and Face | Eco Friendly
- Peri bottle
- If you had any tearing or even if you didn’t. Fill this bottle with warm water and spray as you’re weeing to dilute the urine. It really helps with taking away the sting
- Hivexagon Portable Handheld Home/Travel Bidet, Touchless Cleaning Bidet for Personal Hygiene, Adjustable Long Neck Douche Nozzle Sprayer Bottle Indoors/Outdoors Bidet Bathroom Baby Washer
Stuff you need for when you’re home and will be glad you ordered beforehand
- Incontinence pads.
- If you had an episiotomy or tearing like I have these are a godsend for sitting on without any pants on to get some air to your vagina. Omnitex 60 x 90cm Incontinence Bed Pads – 1400ml – 2000ml Disposable Absorbing Sheets (25x Pads – Premium (1400ml))
- Pumping / feeding bra.
- If you’re planning on breastfeeding no one really tells you that you need a bra to fit the pump too so you can be hands free. This one is super comfortable. BRAVADO! DESIGNS Original Pumping & Nursing Bra
- Breast pumps.
- I didn’t buy any pumps until I got home and had tried breastfeeding. I would recommend going down this path because if you don’t like it then you won’t have spent a shed load of cash. The Hakka and Spectra I can HIGHLY recommend. You’ll be amazed how much milk you get from using the Hakka. The Spectra is super quick too. The Elvie I’m still on the fence about. I think it’s going to come in useful when I pump and dump but it takes a long time to not get very much out
- Hakkaa Manual Breast Pump
- Spectra S2 Hospital Grade Double
- Elvie Double Electric Wearable
- Milk storage bags.
- Bottles
- I’m combi feeding and giving her bottles of breast milk but also formula if I need a break.
- MAM Easy Start Self Sterilising
- Formula
- this one has been great for us but there are SO many out there (6x800g) Kendamil Organic First Infant Milk, Stage 1 – British Made, Organic Whole Milk Formula – With HMOs, No Palm Oil, No Fish Oil, No SOYA, No GMOs
- Tomee Tippee perfect prep machine
- If you’re using bottles this will save you on the night feeds. TRUST ME. Tommee Tippee Perfect Prep Day & Night, Baby Bottle Maker Machine with Digital Display and Adjustable Volume, White
- Baby nail file
- It’s quite weird how long their nails are when they come out! Then they scratch themselves and you will wish you had these already.
- Baby Nails™ – The Wearable Baby Nail File I New Baby Standard Pack – Baby Nail Care Set for Newborn’s (0 Months+)
- Bottle brushes
- yet another thing you didn’t know you need until you know you need it!!
- Bottle Brushes Bottle Cleaning
- Magnesium supplements
- The jury is out as to whether this is helping me with PP insomnia yet but there’s interesting science behind it.
- Tom Oliver Nutrition – Magnesium
- Nightlights
- You’re going to be up at all hours. This selection of nightlights has really helped me not be dazzled / kept awake
- Light Baby, Touch Control
- Deaunbr Soft Light Dual Induction
- LED Night Light Plug in Walls
- waterproof washable mats to go on top of your changing mat
- As soon as my daughters nappy is off she either does a dirty protest or wees all over the mat. These are great. Upgrade Baby Waterproof Changing
Set yourself up when you’re feeding
Before you start make sure you have EVERYTHING you need around you. I always have phone, water, muslin cloth and snacks if you want some. NOTHING is more annoying than feeding a baby and not being able to reach for what you want as it’s just too far. You will thank yourself a million times over just to prep for a few minutes before every feed that you’re set up
Ask for help
Don’t try and do everything yourself. If someone offers to come round to help you clean, feed, hold the baby ACCEPT it. Women often don’t ask for help until we’re on our knees and broken. You don’t get a prize for battling through. Let people help.
